Do You See Me?

Every January, Ken and I discuss and set our individual and couple goals for the following year.

We post them on the refrigerator as a constant reminder to stay focused! I annually set a goal of either reading through the BIble or specific books of the Bible and spiritual practices. I set weekly and monthly goals for what I want to accomplish in my ministry. AND, I also keep a bucket list of goals in my journal for new things I want to achieve and explore in retirement.

We are a culture of goal setters. In our careers, we are people who are motivated to do better and be better. We are trained to be ladder climbers and glass ceiling breakers. In more recent years, it seems we are even more set on being activists and difference makers. Ours is a society of dreamers and doers who work to make this world a better place—for ourselves and for others.

In all of our striving, I wonder if we’ve lost sight of something critical: Seeing the people right in front of us. I don’t just mean looking at, but really seeing them, taking the time to learn to know and understand them.

My sister-in-law is a middle school counselor and assistant principal. At a recent conference on the future of education that she attended, she learned the trajectory of education for the future will be away from careers centered on technology and screens and instead, toward social and emotional fields. Just this morning, I listened to a podcast with child psychologists who said the biggest challenge kids face today is anxiety. Driven by the need to achieve!

This could be discouraging, but I see it instead as a huge opportunity! I’m not suggesting we stop our striving, but instead find balance in our lives. As I was praying, asking God how I can show God’s love to my neighbors and those I interact with this year, I heard  “stop doing” but “just be.” Take time to really help people feel “seen.”

No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.

- I Corinthians 10:24

Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

- I Thessalonians 5:11

How can you encourage the single mom or the retired couple living right next door? What about a co-worker or the person next to you on the treadmill at the gym? The person who steals your parking place where you live? I know it’s not always convenient. I’m not always anxious to text our 80 year old neighbors to see if they want to meet on the patio. But when I leave, I’m always glad I did.

Imagine how much better our community could be if we really began to “see” those living around us, to seek their good. (Maybe that parking space “stealer” is a man on crutches.)

Start by making an invite. Coffee, lunch, an evening on the patio watching the kids play. No agenda, just to find out who they are and what they enjoy. How can you “see” them, encourage or help them?

Let’s be a community of people that aren't so busy striving and doing work to make life better, that we lose sight of the one or two right in front of us!

Pastor Pam

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