Change Is Coming

I have been on staff close to a year and a half now and during that time, in different spaces, I have shared pieces of my testimony.

When asked about my story, I often respond with, “which chapter?” I say that because there are so many areas of my life God redeemed; so many parts of myself He healed. In fact, it was my own healing work that inspired me to pursue my counseling degree to get others emotionally healthy and whole. I like to think I’m in the heart-healing business with God. I get to walk alongside His sons and daughters, and through His power, provide guidance to those struggling. So many times, I see my old self in those I’m helping. I’m reminded that in Christ, I’m a new creation, consciously living in remembrance of how far God has brought me (2 Cor. 5:17). And I want to encourage you to do the same today.

This past weekend, I was sharing with my youngest sister about a time when my life was at an all-time low financially. I was struggling to make ends meet, barely making enough to put gas in my car to get to work. Back then, I had made a habit of skipping meals because I just couldn’t afford to eat more than once a day. I was in my early 20’s, lost and confused about life.

Some of you may have been there before….

Until years later, I reached a breaking point. I was tired of my poor decision-making, fed up with just surviving, unsure of my future. I felt called to more. I needed to break up the monotony. I needed Jesus. And I will never forget the passage I turned to that inspired me to start making changes. In Psalm 51, after David committed adultery with Bathsheba, he was feeling pretty convicted by his sin and wrote this psalm:

“Have mercy on me, O God,

   because of your unfailing love.

Because of your great compassion,

   blot out the stain of my sins.

Wash me clean from my guilt.

   Purify me from my sin”

- Psalm 51:1-2 (NLT)

“Create in me a clean heart, O God.

   Renew a loyal spirit within me”

- Psalm 51:10 (NLT)

I just wonder how much we would grow if we became more like David - a man after God’s own heart (Acts 13:22). A man we know messed up really bad but knew he needed to change.

What I’m about to say isn’t popular or cute, but it’s God’s heart:

I want to continue being someone who is convicted by the things that don’t please God. I want to lay down my own wants for what God has for me. I want God to continue to search my heart and remove any unpleasant thing (Psalm 139:23-24).

Family, this is the heart posture that produces growth and healing.

Today, may you break up the monotony to grab ahold of the newness God wants to do in you. David goes on in Psalm 51 as he’s having this special moment with God:

“Going through the motions doesn’t please you,

   a flawless performance is nothing to you.

I learned God-worship

   when my pride was shattered.

Heart-shattered lives ready for love

   don’t for a moment escape God’s notice”

- Psalm 51:16-17 (MSG)

If you’ve already begun the work to draw closer to Jesus, I want to commend you because I know it’s not easy. If you’re on the fence or struggling to initiate real-life change, I want to encourage you that it will be the best decision you’ll ever make.

And if you don’t know where to start, start with repentance: Ask forgiveness, then turn from the things that are tripping you up. God sees you and He is for you.

Som Tami

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